Tis' The Season... Somewhere

Perhaps not where you live, but in Kapalua, Maui, Hawaii the golf season begins in 20 days with the Mercedes-Benz Championship.
Now I ask you, with the temperature falling, the wind blowing, the snow snowing and Santa still working the department stores, shouldn't we be talking BCS Bowls, what's wrong with Eli Manning, the two Tim's, Tebow & Duncan, and the return of American Gladiators to network television?
Am I crazy, or didn't Tiger just win the "Cup" last week and Zack Johnson the Masters a couple of weeks ago and wasn't it only last month that Angel Cabrera won the U.S. Open?
They say that the older you get the faster time goes by and that maybe true, but holy mackerel, the season just finished. All I can say is that it's a good thing that Hawaii is Hawaii, otherwise they couldn't fill a foursome. But I guess that's the point, Hawaii is Hawaii, and, if you're one of the lucky ones who can afford to tee it up in Maui then I guess the season can't start too soon.
On the other hand, if you've had one more turkey sandwich than you should have, shoveled snow until thought you were going to die, heard more Christmas music than you can stand, you may need January and February just to get over the holidays. In the meantime, turn on the tube, put up your feet, open a fresh bag of chips and imagine that you're Tony Romo, who, in addition to being the quarterback of the Dallas Cowboys, is also dating Jessica Simpson and most importantly is a scratch golfer. Nobody said that life was fair.
And, if you're the kind of guy that needs a plan, listed below is the entire 2008 season, which comes to 6,500 hours of television viewing. Thank God for the remote control.
Jan. 4-7_Mercedes-Benz Championship_FedExCup Points: 25,000_Purse: $5,500,000_Plantation Course at Kapalua_Kapalua, Maui, Hawaii
Jan. 11-14_Sony Open in Hawaii_FedExCup Points: 25,000_Purse: $5,200,000_Waialae CC_Honolulu, Hawaii
Jan. 17-21_Bob Hope Chrysler Classic_FedExCup Points: 25,000_Purse: $5,000,000_The Classic Club_Palm Desert, California _PGA West (Palmer Course)_La Quinta, California _La Quinta CC_La Quinta, California _Bermuda Dunes CC_Bermuda Dunes, California
Jan. 25-28_Buick Invitational_FedExCup Points: 25,000_Purse: $5,200,000_Torrey Pines _San Diego, California
FBR Open_FedExCup Points: 25,000_Purse: $6,000,000_TPC Scottsdale_Scottsdale, Arizona
Feb. 8-11_AT&T Pebble Beach National Pro-Am_FedExCup Points: 25,000_Purse: $5,500,000_Pebble Beach Golf Links_Pebble Beach, California _Poppy Hills_Pebble Beach, California _Spyglass Hill GC_Pebble Beach, California
Feb. 15-18_Nissan Open_FedExCup Points: 25,000_Purse: $5,200,000_Riviera CC_Pacific Palisades, California
Feb. 22-25_Mayakoba Golf Classic at Riviera Maya-Cancun_FedExCup Points: 12,500_Purse: $3,500,000_El Camaleon_Riviera Maya, Mex
Feb. 21-25_World Golf Championships-Accenture Match Play Championship_FedExCup Points: 26,250_Purse: $8,000,000_The Gallery at Dove Mountain_Tucson, Arizona
March 1-4_The Honda Classic_FedExCup Points: 25,000_Purse: $5,500,000_PGA National Champion Course_Palm Beach Gardens, Florida
March 8-11_PODS Championship_FedExCup Points: 25,000_Purse: $5,300,000_Innisbrook Resort - Copperhead_Palm Harbor, Florida
March 15-18_Arnold Palmer Invitational presented by MasterCard_FedExCup Points: 25,000_Purse: $5,500,000_Bay Hill Club & Lodge_Orlando, Florida
March 22-25_World Golf Championships-CA Championship_FedExCup Points: 26,250_Purse: $8,000,000
Doral Golf Resort & Spa_Miami, Florida
March 29-April 1_Shell Houston Open_FedExCup Points: 25,000_Purse: $5,500,000_Redstone GC Tournament Course_Humble, Texas
April 5-8_Masters Tournament #_FedExCup Points: 27,500_Purse: $7,000,000_Augusta National GC_Augusta, Georgia
April 12-15_Verizon Heritage_FedExCup Points: 25,000_Purse: $5,400,000_Harbour Town Golf Links_Hilton Head, South Carolina
April 19-22_Zurich Classic of New Orleans_FedExCup Points: 25,000_Purse: $6,100,000_TPC Louisiana_Avondale, Louisiana
April 26-29_EDS Byron Nelson Championship_FedExCup Points: 25,000_Purse: $6,300,000_TPC Four Seasons Resort_Irving, Texas _Cottonwood Valley GC_Irving, Texas
May 3-6_Wachovia Championship_FedExCup Points: 25,000_Purse: $6,300,000_Quail Hollow CC_Charlotte, North Carolina
May 10-13_THE PLAYERS Championship_FedExCup Points: 27,500_Purse: $9,000,000_TPC Sawgrass_Ponte Vedra Beach, Florida_Phil Mickelson
AT&T Classic_FedExCup Points: 25,000_Purse: $5,400,000_TPC Sugarloaf_Duluth, Georgia
May 24-27_Crowne Plaza Invitational at Colonial_FedExCup Points: 25,000_Purse: $6,000,000_Colonial CC_Ft. Worth, Texas
May 31-June 3_the Memorial Tournament presented by Morgan Stanley_FedExCup Points: 25,000_Purse: $6,000,000_Muirfield Village GC_Dublin, Ohio
June 7-10_Stanford St. Jude Championship_FedExCup Points: 25,000_Purse: $6,000,000_TPC Southwind_Memphis, Tennessee
June 14-17_U.S. Open Championship #_FedExCup Points: 27,500_Purse: $7,000,000_Oakmont CC_Oakmont, Pennsylvania
June 21-24_Travelers Championship_FedExCup Points: 25,000_Purse: $6,000,000_TPC River Highlands_Cromwell, Connecticut
June 28-July 1_Buick Open_FedExCup Points: 25,000_Purse: $4,900,000_Warwick Hills G&CC_Grand Blanc, Michigan
July 5-8_AT&T National_FedExCup Points: 25,000_Purse: $6,000,000_Congressional Country Club_Bethesda, Maryland
July 12-15_John Deere Classic_FedExCup Points: 25,000_Purse: $4,100,000_TPC Deere Run_Silvis, Illinois
July 19-22_U.S. Bank Championship in Milwaukee_FedExCup Points: 12,500_Purse: $4,000,000_Brown Deer Park GC_Milwaukee, Wisconsin__July 19-22_British Open Championship #_FedExCup Points: 27,500_Purse: $8,637,720_Carnoustie GC_Angus, UK
July 26-29_Canadian Open presented by Franklin Templeton Investments_FedExCup Points: 25,000_Purse: $5,000,000_Angus Glen GC - North Course_Markham, Ontario, Can_Jim Furyk_XM 146/GOLF/CBS_Aug. 2-5_Reno-Tahoe Open_FedExCup Points: 12,500_Purse: $3,000,000_Montreux G&CC_Reno, Nevada
Aug. 2-5_World Golf Championships-Bridgestone Invitational_FedExCup Points: 26,250_Purse: $8,000,000_Firestone CC (South Course)_Akron, Ohio
Aug. 9-12_PGA Championship #_FedExCup Points: 27,500_Purse: $7,000,000_Southern Hills CC_Tulsa, Oklahoma
Aug. 16-19_Wyndham Championship_FedExCup Points: 25,000_Purse: $5,000,000_Forest Oaks CC_Greensboro, North Carolina
Aug. 23-26_The Barclays_FedExCup Points: 50,000_Purse: $7,000,000_Westchester CC_Harrison, New York
Aug. 31-Sep. 3_Deutsche Bank Championship_FedExCup Points: 50,000_Purse: $7,000,000_TPC Boston_Norton, Massachusetts
Sep. 6-9_BMW Championship_FedExCup Points: 50,000_Purse: $7,000,000_Cog Hill G&CC_Lemont, Illinois
Sep. 13-16_THE TOUR Championship presented by Coca-Cola_FedExCup Points: 50,000_Purse: $7,000,000_East Lake GC_Atlanta, Georgia
Sep. 20-23_Turning Stone Resort Championship_Purse: $6,000,000_Atunyote Golf Club_Verona, New York
Sep. 27-30_Viking Classic_Purse: $3,500,000_Annandale GC_Madison, Mississippi
Sep. 27-30_The Presidents Cup_The Royal Montreal Golf Club_Montreal, Quebec, Can
Oct. 4-7_Valero Texas Open_Purse: $4,500,000_LaCantera GC_San Antonio, Texas
Oct. 11-14_Frys.com Open benefiting Shriners Hospitals for Children_Purse: $4,000,000_TPC Summerlin_TPC Canyons_Las Vegas, Nevada
Oct. 18-21_Fry's Electronics Open_Purse: $5,000,000_Grayhawk Golf Club - Raptor_Scottsdale, Arizona
Oct. 25-28_Ginn sur Mer Classic at Tesoro_Purse: $4,500,000_Tesoro Club_Port St. Lucie, Florida
Nov. 1-4_Children's Miracle Network Classic presented by Wal-Mart_Purse: $4,600,000_Magnolia GC_Lake Buena Vista, Florida _Palm GC_Lake Buena Vista, Florida
Nov. 5-5_ADT Skills Challenge #_Purse: $800,000 *_Fairmont Turnberry Isle_Aventura, Florida
Nov. 12-13_Wendy's 3 Tour Challenge #_Purse: $1,000,000 *_Lake Las Vegas Resort_Henderson, Nevada
Nov. 22-25_OMEGA Mission Hills World Cup #_Purse: $5,000,000 *_Mission Hills GC - Olazabal_Shenzen, Chi
Nov. 24-25_LG SKINS GAME #_Purse: $1,000,000 *_Celebrity Course_Indian Wells, California
Nov. 28-Dec. 3_PGA TOUR Qualifying Tournament_Purse: $1,057,500 *_Crooked Cat Course_Winter Garden, Florida _Panther Lake Course_Winter Garden, Florida
Dec. 7-9_Merrill Lynch Shootout #_Purse: $2,800,000 *_Tiburon GC_Naples, Florida
Dec. 13-16_Target World Challenge #_Purse: $5,750,000 *_Sherwood CC_Thousand Oaks, California
* Unofficial money, # Not PGA TOUR co-sponsored